I'm Engaged!!

I am so in love.

And he is so in love with me.

And we are going to have the most amazing life together.

I am so excited!

...

wow

Redefining Life

I'm on this Sweet Journey. I love where He's taking me.

If I could sum up whats going on with me in one word right now, that word would be

Unlearning

And in all the unlearning is coming more learning then ever. My brain is so full of stuff that its becoming hard to sort and process. That might be evident whiles trying to read this. But it's an exciting time for me. I feel like I'm part of something bigger than myself. I think we all are, we just have to come to the realization of that and believe it's true.

I'm unleanrning a lot of definitions for things that I've been taught my entire life. I'm realizing that most of the things I've learned have completely different meanings and implications then we think they do. In fact, I'm starting to realize that most things we think we know are probably much different in reality-His reality. And that all started with re-difining CHURCH.

It's funny how the English language works. If I say one word, you immediately and almost involuntarily have a host of implications and preset ideas for what you think that word means and what you think I mean when I use that word. If I could change my vocabulary to say what I really mean instead of what people think I mean because of their assumptions, I would. But then I wouldn't make sense then either, cuz the real meaning behind the things I now know is so uncommon in this world today. (But I am so blessed to find kindred spirits here and there who speak the same language as me). Here are some other things I'm coming to redefine:

CHRISTIAN

DISCIPLE

LOGICAL

RELIGION

PASTOR

TEACHER

LEADER

THE WORD

REALISTIC

I'm unlearning this thing that's happened to me in the last couple years... many would call it ADULT. It's this thing that happened gradually. But it's changed me, and one day I wake up and wonder how did I get here, and where did that place I used to live go? Like realizing you must've eaten some forbidden fruit a while back, but not realizing that it affected you til now, and not even remembering taking a bite. This place of taking life seriously, knowing the difference between realistic and unrealistic, and as if the choice to chose what's realistic is more responsible and more adultish. It's this thing that tells you that dreams and adventures are just not logical at this point, that you have to think with your head and not your heart cuz that only causes pain and difficulty. That taking risks is silly and childish. That being childish is not an option. Stick to what makes sense and what you can explain. But is that really what it is to be an adult? The truth is, not everything can be explained. Not everything that seems unrealistic is unrealistic. And is it really so bad to be child like? I want to have a child like heart. And I think Jesus would have that for me too.

I've become adicted to these podcasts. There's so much TRUTH in them that after listening I can't help but Praise Jesus for his absolute GOODNESS.

Here's just a couple nuggets of those Truths that have rocked my world this week (I'm sure Brad and Wayne won't mind me throwing them out here):

You know you've created God in your own image when he hates all the same people you do

He's not gonna yank us out of our stuff without our cooperation

Presence of love does not mean absence of difficulty or pain

What HE did is what saves us, not my ability to chose him

Nothing motivates humanity like fear
No passion so effectively robs the mind of all its powers of acting and reasoning as fear. -Edmund Burke
My brain hinders what I’m actually capable of
I wanna be who I am whether or not anyone is watching.
The opposite of black and white thinking is not grey….. its color, everywhere!

Equally challenging, stimulating, enlightening, and enthralling are the ongoing conversations I am blessed to have with one-of-the-coolest-people-in-the-whole-world. Living the Life and embracing the Journey in the most real way I've ever been privileged to see, and finding that myself. One of the ongoing themes in our conversations has been about Heart and Mind stuff. Knowing stuff in your mind and knowing stuff in your heart. Almost everything that comes out his face is profound and amazing and I can't get enough. And I am learning more and more about who Jesus is. And Jesus is... the best! Words are puny and fail here, greatly.

Check this out: Matisyahu go to song index, and search under "K" for "King Without a Crown". It's so great! It's making me really happy right now.