Learns

I met with Galina's daughter today. Marina was such a sweetheart. I was getting all her previous job experience down so I could make up her resume. She had a plethora of jobs to speak of and she's only a year older then me. She went on and on in Russian about the details of the jobs she's had and finally her interpreter let out a big "Ooooh." Then she explained to me that the reason is because every time that she started speaking about Christ they would find a reason to let her go or request her to quit. Isn't it surreal. I told them I have heard of these things happening in many other countries, but not so much in Russia lately. But they affirmed that the persecution and prejudice against Christians by the Orthodox in Russia is still very much a reality as it probably was during the Soviet Union days. They can't even hold a job in their supposedly free country because they love the Lord. They are grateful to be here, but the interpreter added her own comment that who knows how long that will last even in the States. I love these Russian gals. They encourage me so much with their faith and joy and testimonies.

I wanted to share a couple things that the Lord taught me this weekend through a friend that my folks had over. There were a couple things that really stuck with me and I've been thinking about them a lot.

Faith is a gift. We can't conjure it up or work it into being. I thought of things I've been "trying" to have faith for. I thought of particular moments of praying for healing where I was trying to conjure up the faith to make it happen. And I thought of things where I knew for a fact that I had genuine faith. (I guess the knowing for a fact is exactly what faith is all about). For example, I know for a fact that God is keeping this mole safe. I have this mole on my back and mom prayed over it when I was young and I've never forgotten it and I've never feared that I'd get skin cancer from it. Cause I just know that he's healed me past present future. And I have faith that even though I feel there's something missing spiritually that he's going to feed me, fill me up, and satisfy that emptiness. I wish it were right this moment, but still I just know that it's going to happen.

The other thing is that We are the Salt of the Earth. Salt does not serve to feed or fill you up. It serves to make you thirsty and wanting more. In sharing Christ with others perhaps as salt we serve to get them interested and hungry for more. We don't need to try to fill them up with food they can't handle by giving them the whole picture. They're liable to throw up.

Some interesting thoughts.

I'm so blessed right now. My totally awesome friend gave/lent me some furniture! She made my house a home. I actually have a place to sit in the living room now. And yikes she also threw in a TV and DVD player. So now y'all have to come visit me so you can sit on furniture and watch TV and let me be your hostess. I'll feed you. No charge... I promise. Be my guest. How fun is that!? This is a new thing for me, so as silly as it is, I'm going to enjoy it. Thank the Lord for the simple things in life like a place to rest your bum.

The new Pad

Here's some pics of my new place. nothin fancy as you can see. but its warm and dry and quiet. When you gonna come live with me Kel?

America Bless God

Are you in need of some encouragement today? Well I got some.

I met with my first Russian client yesterday. She doesn't speak a word of English, so her cousin Natasha was translating. Galina was such a sweetheart. She has a daughter my age. I wonder if she thinks it's weird to have me so young as her job counselor. Anyway, we went through all the paper work and I was so encouraged by her answer to the question "what do you want in your life for the future?" She said that she wanted to learn English well enough to get a job in her field as a dermatologist so that she can share Jesus with her patients. She's a Christian. And she was overwhelmingly blessed to hear that I am too! You don't need to speak the same language to share this spiritual connection. She loves the Lord and is passionate about sharing Him with others. I can't wait til she does speak English because God's going to use her as a missionary to this sad country of America. Not that she sees the U.S. that way. She is so happy to be here and loves this country and the freedoms it provides.

Being at this job is helping me to appreciate more and more that I was born here in America. I've heard many stories from my clients of the things they left behind when they came to America as refugees. I can't fathom what they've been through. I'm amazed every day that I get to work with them and help them adjust to this place where they are free. Sure, there are many other challenges they face in coming to live here, but they are nothing compareds to what they've escaped from.

Press In

So I'm finally moved into my new place. It's nothing fabulous, but it's a place to lay my head. I finally got a bed after sleeping on the floor for a week. I still don't have any other furniture tho. It's interesting. I'm not complaining tho. God's been so good to me.

I went to North Carolina for a week with my folks to visit my bro Joe and sis Eva. Good times. Got to hear Heidi and Roland Baker and they had some amazing things to say. They're so free in the spirit and free from religion. It's so refreshing to be in their presence.

We saw Heidi again just last Wednesday in Maplewood, MN at a healing conference. It was cool. So I decided to check out the church where the conference was held this Sunday morning to see what a Sunday morning service was like. It was pretty cool. I went by myself and just enjoyed worshiping the Lord.. I didn't really take the time to meet any one tho. Maybe I'll go again next week and stick around a little bit longer. It still has a religious feel to it, but I decided it's better to be a part of something where people are seeking after God imprefectly then to be a part of nothing and try to seek him completely on my own... I've already figured out that it's really HARD! Why it's so hard, I'll never understand why.

And that leads to what the Lord's been teaching me in big ways these last couple weeks. I realized that I give up really easily. I get frustrated fast and give up when I'm expecting a touch from the Lord and nothing happens... I get mad! I get frustrated, I compare myself to others, I get easily distracted, I get discouraged, and I give up. I just say, forget it, He's ignoring me, doesn't he want me to want him, what am i doing wrong.... yadda yadda... all that stuff. But the last few days expecially I keep hearing the phrases "Press In" "Seek with all your heart" "Persevere" "Reach" PRESS IN. I feel the Lord is telling me to not give up so easily. He wants to know how much I really want Him. How hungry am I? I do want him, but I get discouraged because I feel like finding him shouldn't be so dang hard. But I have to believe not according to my experiences, but according to His Word which is truth that when I seek Him I will find him when I seek him with all my heart. So I'm asking the Lord for more and more hunger. I don't want to give up anymore. He's worth my time and my pressing in.

on the move

Tomorrow I move into my new place. I'm pretty excited to have my own place. Just pray for me if you think of it that I will be safe in the city all by my lonesome. It's a little weird... I felt more safe traveling in China standing alone amongst a see full of black-haired, black-eyed Chinese then I often do here in down town Saint Paul. What's the Deal?

Once I get settled maybe I'll post a picture of my new place for you.

I'm loving my job so much. I STILL feel so so blessed to have this job. The feeling of gratitude and amazement has not left me. I appreciate it so much. I hope I can do it to the best of my ability and improve myself in many ways.

I have a dark confession to tell you though. It's something that I am so so ashamed of. The reason I humbly tell you is to ask for your prayers. Seriously. There is a fear of man that plagues me even in my dreams. It's disturbing me. Do you know what I mean when I say fear of man? I mean that I fail to make use of oportunities to share Jesus. I fail to wear his name boldy and proudly and unashamedly. I fail to open my mouth in his defense. I fail in so many ways to make him known. This is disturbing me so much and I want it to stop. I need to be delivered from this fear of man. I need to die to myself and know the truth that I know in my heart in my head. I am sick of giving into the stifflings of the enemy.

I want to know the authority and character of Jesus Christ and be emerced in that. I want to be baptized, dunked, totally enraptured by hiM.

Thanks for praying this into reality.

Going the Distances

I'll be moving into my new apartment Sept. 30. I'm excited to have my own place. I think it will be fun. Plus it's so close to work. There's so many things to do, which is good because it will keep me busy as I don't have a lot of friends down here and don't have a TV.

I have plenty of other things to keep my busy as well. I'll be in my friend's wedding this weekend. I hope it's not too cold. A million blessings to you Tiff and Joel! Then comes the move. Then I'll be going on a road trip with mom and dad to NCarolina to visit Joey and Eva. That'll filled with events as well. We get to go to some conferences. One to hear Roland and Heidi Baker. Oh my goodness that's going to be awesome. In case you've never heard of them, they have an orphanage in Africa and God is doing AMAZING INCREDIBLE OUTSTANDING FABULOUS UNBELIEVABLE-BELIEVABLE things there. You MUST read their book. You can buy it on half.com. It's called "There's Always Enough." Please read it. It will change your life. The other conference is called Harvest Fest. I'm looking foward to hearing Jason Upton. He's got some really powerful music that truly blesses the Lord's heart. It's going to be good. And ofcourse I'm so looking foward to seeing my siblings.

Then after that its back into the frigid reality of MN to trudge through another winter. I realized that I'm really a fairweather kinda gal. I'm not too thrilled about wearing coats and mittens and blowing my nose more then i already do, and having to warm up the car... all that good stuff. I guess I could handle going snow boarding a few times tho... missed that a lot when i was in China.

Hope you are all well. Drop me a line some time.

I created a Slide Show! Check it out!

Dixon!

I decided kind of last minute to go down to Illinois to visit my lovely friend and ex roomate from college. The ride down wasn't bad even though I was going on little sleep, driving a manual, and no radio in the car! I had a good time singing any worship song that came to mind at the top of my lungs. Kelly is a great host and I'm already having a great time. I'm at the dixon library with her now. She's showing me around their little town. it's really old and cute. lots of history. she lives at her grandmas house as shes in a nursing home now. the house is filled with 80 some years of accumulation of little treasures and lots of stuff. im gonna help her clean up the yard a bit which i don't mind cuz i like the flowers and being out side. we're gonna go to this little art festival in the town square and maybe go garage saling and to a green house. i really want to buy a plant for my office. it's nice to get away from the big city for a bit. And it's especially nice to see my Kelly. Last I saw her was when she saw me off the day I left for China over a year ago.

I hope you all have a great Labor day.

I accepted the full time permanent position today! I was debating it for so long. First I was sure I didn't want to do it for fear that I would get too comfortable in a certain lifestyle and forget my desire and heart to go overseas and serve the Lord in bigger ways. But then my mom had a good point. She said if the Lord has really put that in my heart, then as long as I'm seeking him he will keep those things in my heart. I also figured out that I can pay off my loans in the year that I work here! So that's awesome.

It's been a challenging week. I had to learn how to handle a domestic abuse situation, and trying to find jobs for people with zero English, and cultural barriers and transportation barriers. It's so challenging. I learn so much every day. Some times its pretty overwhelming.

I've decided that now that I'm going to be here longer I need to start getting out and doing things and meeting people since I don't really have any friends down here. I would love to take a pottery class, and language classes, and attend some kind of home fellowship/Bible study thing, and get involved in the community somehow and serve with other believers doing some ministry or service. So these are the kinds of things I will be looking out for.

Power Love Sound Mind

I have to make another decision. Yikes. I just found out that I have the oportunity to get a permanent position here. The job is great and I really like the people I work with. I feel so blessed to be here. But am I ready to settle? Am I ready for a career? Am I ready to give up being able to up and leave whenever I get the notion? The word "permanent" is kinda freaking me out I think. So this is how I feel right now... unless God makes it very clear that I should keep this job, I am going to keep the plans I had before and move to North Carolina to be with my brother and sister for a while.
It's raining today. It's been hot all week, and of course, the day that we are going to have the company picnic, it rains. Picnic must be somekind of trigger word for Rain in the heavenly places. So yeah, I'm going to the company picnic. Rain or shine. I've gotta stop being anti social. The people here are really nice.
I've got a good song stuck in my head: Power, Love, Sound mind is mine.

God is Good

I just read the coolest article in Catalyst (magazine put out by Minneapolis Foundation). It began with how a Hmong refugee family from Laos settled in St. Paul, but as concerns about crime and safety grew, they decided to move to a rural area. The daughter had been watching "Little House on the Prarie" on TV and learned that Walnut Grove was an actual town in Minnesota. So they decided to move there. They were the town's first Hmong residents..."modern-day settlers." The rest of the story goes like this, "Walnut Grove was a small town struggling to survive. As businesses closed and young families left for metropolitan areas, the town was facing school closures due to its dwindling population. Since their arrival [the Hmong family] started several businesses in town and has helped attract the settlement of new residents. The arrival of Hmong families--now nearly one third of the town's population--has led to a community renewal."
I just thought that was pretty cool.
Well, work is going well, and as you can see I am learning many new things. Today I volunteered to help out with a job fair we hosted and I met some really interesting people. One of which was this guy from Ethiopia, and he was such a character. He reccomended some local Ethiopian restaraunts that I'm anxious to try, and encouraged me to visit Ethiopia someday if I get the chance.
At this place of business they have a peer award they call the Holey Mackeral. It can be given to anyone or by anyone working here at Lifetrack for outstanding work or something like that. Someone gave me a Holey Mackeral today for volunteering! So that's kind of cool I guess!
I'm excited for tomorrow, because I will be taking a client out to apply for jobs around the area. I look foward to getting to know her better. She is SO incredibly shy. Her name is Khadija and she's Somali. How fortunate am I to hang out with people from all over the world every day! God is sooooo good.
He's been working me over a lot lately. It's a constant dying of myself that is so painful, but hugely neccesary. I've done a lot of crying and struggling. But God is good. After the storms are still, calm waters. He's so good.

On the Job

So I started my new job yesterday! So far it's been pretty low key, trying to remember the million things that go into this. I'm still just amazed that I have this job. It's a miracle. I am officially a job counselor for refugees who have been in the US for less than 8 months. How cool is that. I can't wait til I get my first client. It's going to be so interesting.

I feel like I don't get enought sleep though. It takes me over an hour to get to and from work now that I'm living in Chanhassen with my bro and his family. But hopefully soon I will be relocated closer to St. Paul. God's so good to me. I'm just flabbergasted at his faithfulness.

He's Too Good

God got me a sweet job. I wasn't even looking for a job! My sister told her old high school friend that I was interested in working with refugees and immigrants (which is what she is currently doing), and asked if she could possibly give me some contacts or some kind of guidance in that regard. She said, well actually we are looking for some one right now! So within about two days I applied, interviewed and got the job!! I will be helping refugees find jobs! I am so excited. There were some other commitments that I had to get out of. I still feel bad about that. But I know that God has really worked this out especially in my favor. I went for the job without knowing what I'd do for a car or where I'd live. But I still went for it and knew that if it was God's doing he'd take care of all that. And he is taking care of it Royally! He loves me too much! After I got the job, I told a few people and randomly my friend who lives in St. Paul said she needed a roommate as soon as possible! God, how could I have ever doubted your goodness? His love is undeniable. Why do I doubt him? Praise the Lord. He is so good to me. He provides Royally even when I have been unfaithful to him. I don't understand his ways. But I humbly rejoice that he loves ME!!
Anyway
I start tomorrow now. I better get some shut eye so I can have a good first day. Just worried about the drive there in the morning. Other then that, I think it will be great.
Tell you all about it.

Etc.

I started working at the Salvation Army Northwoods Camp this week. I’ve spent most of my time there this week. Mom works in the kitchen there, so we can go to a from there with each other. This is their first year of holding summer camp so things are pretty disorganized. It’s only a few miles from our house! I feel a little guilty cause it’s like I’m betraying Grindstone where I’d been a loyal camp counselor for five years! It’s all good. You’ll never guess what position they’ve given me at Northwoods. I’m the camp nurse! It’s so funny. I’m the least qualified person to be the nurse. All the counselors and staff there were required to take a 3 hour first aid course. Now the only person without experience or training is doing the job! All I’m really doing is taking care of the campers’ meds. If anything really serious were to happen there are plenty of people I could ask, including an LPN who’s helping out in the kitchen. The Lord has such a sense of humor to open up this position for me. I’ve yet to see what his purpose in it is.
It’s been good to be home, but sadly I’m quickly forgetting about China almost as if it was simply a dream and not reality. I don’t want to forget it, but I feel so strangely about talking about it. I haven’t talked about it much, cuz I’m asked very few questions about it and I feel like people are tired of hearing about something they could never truly share with me. So I just let it go, and with it go some memories. Sad! I’ve got to get over that and just talk. There’s other things I’ve got to get over. Here comes the part where you learn more about my issues. In China I’m the cool foreigner who can do no wrong, so I feel very comfortable to talk and initiate friendships and be myself. But when I’m around these crazy American’s I shut down. What’s the deal? Jesus, free me from the fear of man! Seriously.
I’ve finally started to be able to breathe lately. Allergies be gone! Since I’ve started to sleep in the tent I wake up without sneezing and going through a box of klenex. It’s awesome. It even rained buckets last night and I slept right through the storm.
I’m enjoying going out into the field with my Dad and Grandpa and watering the baby apple trees. In the next few years I’ll have to learn to start calling it the orchard. There’s about 40 trees out there. And then there’s the raspberries and blueberries to pick. It’s really good for me to be here. I must apologize to all my friends whom I love dearly who haven’t heard much from me since I’ve been home. I just haven’t felt ready to be entirely social quite yet. August is my designated friend month. I am planning a Tour de Amigos. Then in September I am off to start something new in North Carolina.
I admit its been a struggle for me spiritually since I’ve been home. Being so secluded and disconnected from a church body for so long had really dried me out. It’s been so hard for me to keep up with every one here. The first couple weeks home I started to get really angry with God as I compared myself to others and where they were at with the Lord. But He’s slowly getting to me, teaching me that I’m in a different place and it has nothing to do with any one else. And the big picture is, it’s not about me. It’s so elementary, but for where I am right now, it’s like hearing it for the first time and it’s hard. Please pray for me as I press on and let the Lord gently draw me back into fellowship.

Home!

Hey!
I finally made it home after 36 hours of flying, changing planes four times, and layovers. It's good to be home. But I haven't had much time to recover from jet lag so I am still really tired.. I've been really busy every day since the day I got here. And probably will be busy for another week at least. I'm finding it hard to keep up with every one. I'm still so tired and haven't really had time to process what all has happened.
Well, Happy July 4 to you all. I just came in from watchin a great fire works show with my family. My nephews are just now getting old enough to really appreciate it. It was great fun.
It's good to be home, but also really weird. I feel like I've never left. I feel like I've been home all along, but somehow I've downloaded all kinds of new memories. While I was in China it felt like a long time to be away from home. But now that I'm back it felt like no time at all.
I miss my students a lot. And now that I'm no longer with them, I keep thinking of all kinds of things that I should have done or should have done better. I guess there's no use in that.
I look foward to seeing all my friends again. Hopfully this jet lag will fade out really soon. I want to have as much energy as possible as I see every one and prepare for what's next.
For the summer I will live at my parent's home and will work with my mom at the new Salvation Army camp just a few miles from home. So hopefully I can make some cash this summer before I head down to North Carolina.
I can't tell you how grateful I am to all of you who have been praying for me. It touches me deeply. There's not a doubt in my mind that it's because of your prayers that I remained safe and healthy while in China. The Lord that blessed me so much. I am humbled by your faithfulness and ministry. GOD BLESS YOU!

I've had requests to keep this blog going. I will try. You know, being in China was a great expereince and there's no doubt that I needed prayer throughout that time. Now that I am home I humbly ask that you continue to pray for me. There are some battles I face that don't disappear simply by getting on a plane and flying away (although I wish it were that easy). I'm not one to talk about myself very openly, so it's hard when I'm given the oportunity.

It's late and the pillow beckons. Good night wishes to you.

Last Words From This Foreign Land

Goodbye China! Goodbye my students! Goodbye my new friends! Goodbye moldy apartment! Goodbye sweet vendor ladies! Goodbye fresh mangoes, lychees, longans, etc! Goodbye to all that has been my reality for the last 10 months.

Hello Home! Hello family and friends! Hello bills, loans and car payments! Hello culture that I understand! Hello comfort foods! Hello Mexian food, fresh baked bread, BBQed chicken, and pizza! Hello old/ new reality.

Today's the day I fly home. Only a couple more hours and I will begin the long journey. I have packed my bags (mamamia!) and cleaned my place. I will be traveling for something like 32 hours! I have four different flights and and super long over night layover in LA.

Keep my in your prayers if you would for protection. The Lord's been faithful to me throughout this entire trip. I know his faithfulness endures. He's so good to me. I am so undeserving.

Brenda and I spent the day together yesterday just shopping, eating, hanging out. Ate at some of our favorite places one last time. Then we watched a movie while she finished up packing. She left early this morning.

I didn't get much sleep the past two nights, yet I feel pretty good and energetic. Maybe it's adrenaline from all the moving. The night before I was restless so I watched a movie til super late. Then lasst night I had a million mosquitos buzzing around me. So about 3 in the morning I was wide away chasing them down and killing as many as I could. It might be a good thing that I haven't slept much, that way I might be able to sleep better on the plane and maybe I will adjust to the time change quicker. We shall see.

I can't wait to see all my family and friends. I'm courious to find out what my life will be like from here on. I guess it's time to pack up the computer. Thanks for reading all this time. I hope I was able to share my experiences with you in a meaningful way. The next time I write here, I may be in the US! I don't think it's hit me yet. It hasn't sunk in that I am leaving and might never come back here, and might never see my Chinese friends and students again. Like I always like to say... Life is strange stuff.

Stuff up the WahZooo!

It is really embarassing how much stuff I have accumulated. I can't believe it. I honestly didn't really realize until I started to pack up my stuff and found that I had to send another box home or I wouldn't have made it. I am making a promise to myself that I will never do this again. What I mean is, I will never accumulate so much stuff on an overseas trip again. I think I went a little overboard. Yikes. Just this morning I went out with Brenda cuz she told me about this really cute fairly cheap place to buy traditional Chinese looking clothes, and I bought some more things. Then I started packing and, woa. When its spread all over my apartment it didn't seem like much. But trying to fit it all in a couple suitcases is quite the task. I'm worried about being overweight and having to pay airport fees. Would the Lord honor a prayer for weightlessness after my splurging?

Yesterday was my last day of teaching. I was determined to spend it well. It really was a nice day up until the end. I was surrounded by my students. Most of them had no idea I was leaving so soon and that I wouldn't be back. So just a few who really have taken the time to get to know me made it a point to seek me out throughout the day. The last class still was challenging. When it was over I was relieved. But at the same time I love these kids. My last thing at school was to be English corner. I had prepared a nice time. We were going to play a game and chat and take pictures. I was really looking foward to it as were the students who would go. As we walked to the English Corner classroom, about five students and I, we had a great time chatting and lauging together. I was getting really excited to make one last memory here with them. As we entered the classroom, there sat Lillian. In her perky manipulative voice she told us that she is cancelling english corner so I could help her translate something. What a kill joy. I was so angry. I told her that this is my last day and I want to spend it with the students not being used by the school. This was the last thing I wanted to be doing. So she smiled and said, oh! ok! I'll give you 20 minutes. Oh my goodness. I wanted to cry. And so did the students. I wanted so much to tell her off and refuse, but I didn't want to make a scene in front of the students and cause anyone to lose face. I was mad and she knew it. But she didn't seem to give a darn. All she was thinking about was getting her stupid translation thing done. So the kids and I took some pictures and said goodbye. And off I went to be a schmuck, a doormat, a chump, a pushover. Gotta love the thesaurus. They've never asked me to help them with translations before until this day. Anyother day I would have been happy too. Arg.

I really want to see a couple students before I go, like over the weekend. But there are so many things going on. And Arthur and Anna are leaving tomorrow morning and I'd like to say goodbyes to them too. It will be nice to be home where I can just crash when all these goodbyes are over.

I keep thinking of ways that this whole experience could have been better. I mean, how could I have made more of this time. I should have prayed more. I should have taken more pictures. I should have spent more time outside of my apartment. I should have been more open about my faith. I should have taken more chances like eating crazier things, going parasailing, taking the train. I should have taken more time to spend with my students. I should have done more physically active things. I should have taken more initiative in making friends. I should have learned more Chinese. I should have bought less!
I think these are my only regrets.

So I went to the post office today to mail one last box. I think the worker girl there was new because she was slow as ever. The last few boxes I've mailed went smoothly and fairly quickly. But this girl was so slow and so ditsy it was taking forever. I am so glad that this will be my last trip to one of the worst places in China... the post office.

While Brenda and I were out this morning we took some snap shots of the lovely faces we see everyday along the street. Then we had them printed out and gave them each their own picture. It was so cute! They loved it. Like Brenda said, this is the best gift we could give them. They are so great.

A'Tad

I promised Eva I'd write every day til I went home, but it's already past midnight and I haven't found the time to write a propper post. Hopefully tomorrow I can share more. I have so much to do and so many people want to see me before I go. I feel pulled in a hundred different directions. I've got to get some rest. Good night.

Saying a Thousand Goodbyes (at least)

Some Students and me from Class 19
It's been such a sad and busy week. Every time I go into a class I know it is the last time. So every day is a last time. The last couple days I have stayed at the school and had lunch with my students in the school cafeteria. So we just hang out and chat.
Tuesday night the school took us out for a farewell dinner. We went to a nice place and ordered to our hearts desire. Grace, Maggie, Mark and one of the vice principals were there with Brenda, Arthur, Anna, and me. Brenda brought her laptop and showed a slide show of some of the pictures I have taken throughout the past year. The principal asked us many questions about how we thought of the school and the students, and they thanked us for our work. Then they gave us each a parting gift... these really funny kung fu figurines.
Each day as I get closer to going home I feel sadder and sadder, yet more excited! It's the weirdest feeling. I'm so excited to go home, yet so sad to leave.
I've been really busy trying to get my things together and sort through things. I had a huge pile of stuff that I knew I wasn't going to take home so I let maggie rummage through it and she took most of it, which is great. She's like me, hates to see anything go to waste. It's so hard to believe that tomorrow is my last day of teaching. And that in 4 days I will be going home. The feeling that I might never come back here or see these people again is really sad.

I'm sorry, I feeling like I'm really depressing right now. Ok, happy thoughts. I had such fun in class today. We are playing "Dice of Fortune." It's like Wheel of Fortune only with dice as you may have guessed. It's such fun. They really get into it, especially when we play boys vs. girls.

Tonight we may go to the HaiBin hotel one last time for a swim in the spa. Most of my time before I leave is already booked with things to do and people to see.

When Brenda gets back from class today her and I are going to go to all our usual spots and take photos of the great shopkeepers that we see everday, and the ladys on the street where we buy our veggies. They have the best faces and sweetest smiles. Most of them probably never get their picture taken. So we're going to get the pictures all printed out and give them a copy. They'll love it.

The Beginning of the End

Wow. It's the beginning of the end. This is my last week. today I taught three classes for the very last time. It kind of felt like any other day. I thought the kids might make something more of it, but nothing really. It's not like I'm going to throw myself a goodbye party. So we took some pictures and played a game. And that was that. It's hard to know what they're thinking when they're all together like that. It's when I talk to them outside of class that I find out how they really feel.
I spent all of Saturday cleaning my place and kinda putting things together for packing. I still have so much stuff. I can't believe how much I've accumulated.
I know more happened this weekend, I just can't think right now. My stomach is still feeling queezy. Brenda suggested I go on a liquid diet and give my digestive system a break. She's probably right, but I'm so hungry!
It hasn't been easy to be with her as much as I am. She's the most cynical and ethnocentric person I've ever met. I just put up with it cuz I have no one else to hang out with. She's really cool otherwise and I'll miss her. But it's also going to be refreshing to be away from her. I feel aweful saying it, but it's true.
Sunday night we went to Lillian's home again to make zongzi. Her mother taught us how to make. You put rice, bean, peanut, meat, or whatever you want into bamboo leaves and fold it up tightly, then preasure cook them for and half hour. Yummy. It was a nice time. She has a really nice family. Here's some pictures of us making zongzi, and the finished products wrapped up. They're really good, trust me.
Just got back from shopping with Lillian. She was helping me find some things. It's a great night. The weather is so hot during the day, so it's great when it cools off a little in the evening.
Please pray for my friend who was in a bad car accident. My mind is even more set on home.