Story of Success

In my job I have the opportunity to write up "Success Stories" on particularly stellar clients. A success story that I submitted was chosen to be used for a brochure that they are putting together for our agency! Most of it was summarized, and the part in bold was quoted:


Mohamed and Yusuf are brothers who arrived in the United States from Ethiopia in June 2007. They were enrolled with Lifetrack in August 2007. They came with all the barriers common to brand new refugees on American soil, including very limited English, limited transportation and little to no work experience. Still, they were eager to begin working. Their job counselor had them attend a job fair for Little Caesar’s just a week after their enrollment. Their counselor helped them fill out their first job application and they were given a short interview. They were not able to communicate in English with the Little Caesar’s representative, but the recruiter saw something in them that he liked and wanted to give them a chance. They were hired on the spot! The recruiter worked closely with the job counselor and interpreters to help Mohamed and Yusuf understand the job requirements. The Little Caesar’s recruiter went above and beyond to make this opportunity work out for the brothers, and they understood what a unique chance they were being given. They are currently working part time at Little Caesar’s. They are still smiling when they arrive after taking the one-hour bus ride to work from high school where they attend full time. Mohamed and Yusuf work hard with the manager to overcome language barriers through creative ways. Their success can be attributed to their positive attitudes, hard work, and most of all to an employer who saw their value beyond their barriers, and gave them a chance.


I nominated this employer for an award through our agency, and my clients received a gift card. It's great to be able to recognize people for being extra great. And I'm glad I'm in a position to do that.

dot dot dot

I'm having one of those moments of contemplation, but not sure if I should waste the time if I'm not going to come to any conclusions or defining moments.
I rather feel like Paul in Romans 7 today. On second thought, not quite. It's not that I do what I don't want to do and don't do what I want to do, but rather I do what I want to do but probably shouldn't and want to want to do what I should do. But then is there really "shoulds?" If everything is permissable but not everything beneficial, does that take away "shoulds?" Or is the "should" that which is permissable AND beneficial and the shouldn't the permissable but not beneficial?
I feel like I'm to old to be dealing with drama. Drama is for high-schoolers and college kids, right? Is it just a myth that life is supposed to get simpler when you get older? Well, maybe drama never dies, but at least I feel like I should know who I am and what I believe and be able to stick by that. There's that "should" again.
Perhaps I secretly like the drama since it keeps life interesting.

And then there's God. When I take my eyes off myself and back on him, that's when things really clear up and that's where simple comes in. Even though things may still seem hairy, at least I can trust him that he knows how to untagle my mess. He just wants me to love him, and its not about "shoulds" and "shouldn'ts" anymore. It's so simple.

" ? "

Someone shared it, and I too must spread the fun.


The "Blog" of "Unnecessary" Quotation Marks.

Children of Heaven

If you haven't seen THIS FILM, you must. It is an absolute joy to watch. I actually saw it while in China, even though it is an Iranian film. I was recently reminded of it when a coworker began describing this foreign film that she had seen and loved.

I find I'm lately turning into quite the film and book critic. I'm pretty sure my opinions are right on, but I suppose everyone would say that about their own opinions. What I mean is, I think you will find that I am right when I say something is worth your while. That's a pretty confident statement, don't you think? I'm surprised too!

Watch the film.

Jolly Good

I love autumn. The colorful trees, the deep blue sky, the crisp air. The feelings of change. 2007 will be over sooner than we think. I always knew that 2007 would be a good year for me for some reason. And it was. A lot of big things happened. But it's only October, not yet time to reflect on the year. There are still things to come.

Photos compliments of Eva the Beva'.


I haven't told many stories of work lately I believe, so I thought I'd share with you my day. I had a good day at work today. In fact, the day went so wonderfully that I couldn't find it as easy to go home. But truthfully, I was doing more than my job.
The day started as it always does, with me thinking a dose of caffine would help, yet fighting the urge to become a coffee drinker; and scrounging for some edibles in my desk as I didn't have breakfast...again.
After a couple meetings and the usual job stuff I got a call that a client had an interview today! This is always exciting! Infact, I got two calls like that today! For a client to get an interview is a big big thing and almost as exciting as actually getting hired somewhere since it happens that infrequently.
I scheduled time to drive Buja to her interview, so to be sure she would be on time. You gotta love Buja. She is the jolliest Ethiopian woman you will ever meet. I adore her jolly spirit. I can't think of any other word that best describes her... JOLLY. Her English is only so-so, but there's something about Buja and me. I've been working with her for months now and we've really bonded. She trusts me and likes me so much. It's a blast. Even though her English is sketchy, we communicate with eyes and looks and smiles and ... it just works.
So if you can picture Buja, she is around 50 years old, wears a hijab (head covering), she's a bit shorter than me but you know by her frame that she's one tough cookie. When she first meets someone she is shy and looks so scared and unsure, but after a few moments you will find out she has the best sense of humor and loves to laugh at herself. I could go on and on at what a character she is.
So I take her to this interview for a cleaning job, and she is terrified because I told her she would have to be interview on her own without me there with her. Turns out the guy comes over and basically says that she was starting that moment, and never asked her a single interview question. Not only that but he lets me come along to show her the job. This as you might guess makes Buja SOOO much more at ease that I'm with her, and this guy "Butch" is actually glad for it too (when normally my presence usually deters employers as it causes clients to look incompetent). So I'm loving "Butch" for being so cool about it AND of course for hiring my client on the spot, and Buja is happy because I'm there as her security blanket. As lame as the story is becoming due to lack of eloquence, it was the best time. If you ever see her face and hear her smile and watch her make fun of her self in broken English, its hard not to be delighted by her.
I took Buja home (which she is always eternally grateful for not having to ride the bus). She always says, "Thank you, my Sister." She is always calling me her sister, when really I could be her daughter. By the time I drop her off it's already past 5pm (when I usually head home from work), but she invites me into her home. How could I resist. I love this woman. Her apartment is so cute, full of Ethiopian cultural art that she herself made. I commented on how beautiful and uniqe the items were, and she gave me one! It is a dried gourd with colorful beadwork around it and dangling from it... hard to describe, but very cool an unlike anything you've probably ever seen. And ofcourse her and her family shower me with treats and hospitality. She has only herself and her three daughters. I don't know her whole story, but as most cases with refugees I'm sure there is a lot of pain. Yet she laughs and smiles as if there was none of it.
I enjoyed so much chatting with her in her home. And of all the crazy things she tells me, she says that the only thing she'll watch on tv is wrestling. Oh my goodness, I laughed so much. Can you imagine this little old Ethiopian woman loves to watch wresting. What fun. She is such a character.
We exchanged a big Ethiopian hug goodbye (side to side, like the french kind of), and I left feeling so much love for her and so much delight in being able to know her and spend time with her. Of course I am reminded that she is Muslim. And I pray for her. Pray she can use that charisma and contagious laughter and jollyness for the Lord. What can I do but love Buja and pray for her?

Lewis Nuggets

To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it careful round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket--safe, dark, motionless, airless--it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable... The only place outside Heaven where you can be perfectly safe from all the dangers or love is Hell.

C.S. Lewis, The Four Loves

Warning:

Don't read THIS ARTICLE unless you are ready to pray; otherwise there's no reason to expose yourself to the crap (understatement) that goes on in the world.

I have a Congolese client.

These things are happening as you are reading this. It's desturbing and overwhelming. It's too much to wrap your brain and heart around. It's unreal. It's easier to forget about it and go on with our cushy safe lives and pretend that fellow human beings aren't suffering the worst atrocities.

Think of how you might feel towards the criminals and what kind of people they must be. And think also that given the right circumstances, you are not above doing such things yourself... full of sin and darkness without Jesus.

And think about the women and their pain. And if sovereign God didn't place you here in cozy America, you could be among them.

It's a place far away and the brutality and chaos and disregard for the value of human life can easily make us feel superior or even more human then they are.... but they are just as human as us... we are not above such things... save for the GRACE of God and the BLOOD of Jesus.

Pray for them... all of them. The victims and the torturers. They need Jesus SO much.

The Day After

I decided that everything is going to be ok.





I don't have everything figured out. I don't have a clue what's going to happen next. But I decided to believe God when he says he has it under control.

And here's proof:

Here's me looking oh-so-hot in my favorite rubber fishing boots in one of my most beloved places in the entire world... the road to grandma and grandpas house canopied by trees, brilliant with fall colors.

How many people in this world are lucky enough to live in a place like this and have the freedom to walk around wearing ugly rubber boots and go fishing on a monday... I'm guess not too many. Yeah... everything is going to be just fine.

Minimal Reflections

The events of the last couple weeks have been pretty stressful and strange. I haven't allowed myself any reflection time, but have kept myself overly busy. I'm a little afraid of what will happen if I am left alone with my thoughts. In times of solitude I tend to try to avoid reflection by turning on the TV or reading a book. But I can justify the reading part by telling you that the book I'm reading is fantastic. It has messed with my theology so much and led me to look at numerous topics in a whole new light. You must read The Divine Romance.

Do I really want to start a reflection on Grandpa passing away? He's with Jesus now, and I'm jealous. That's all I got for you on that right now.

I am going to tell you the dream I had last night because it was very strange. Could it be the sushi I ate last night? I had a dream that I bought some used hockey sticks at this weird whole-in-the-wall store. I remember testing the strength of the sticks so make sure they could withstand the abuse we give them on the ice. I decided to buy the bundle of them and they were $5 each. I looked around the store some more, and there was rows and rows of fish tank/ aquarium items that I found very facinating. I tried to make my way down the aisles to check them out... the owner of the store suggested I put down the hockey sticks so I don't knock anything over. How thoughtful. Next thing I remember was looking at a bunch of exotic fish in this huge aquarium, and deciding to buy different kinds. Someone might have warned me about dangers of putting certain kinds of fish together, but I was going for how cool the fish looked. Next thing I remember was watching helplessly as one fish, with a scorpion like tail plunged its tail into the body of another cool fish, which I think was my favorite cuz it was so cool... it was black and yellow and had a unique texture. It happened incredibly fast, and I remember exactly how I felt when it happened... I felt helpless, devistated, shocked, disgusted, terrified. It was gruesome and disturbing. I can see the scene in my mind, and it disturbs me even now... like more than it should. Why does it disturb me so much?

Myanmar is in quite a state right now. We have many Burmese-Karen clients, so these events directly affect my job. There were many Karen demonstrating at the capitol last week, and among them were people I see in the office weekly.

My job is going to be changing a lot in the next few weeks. Programs are being added, so coworkers in my program will be transfering to other programs, and 3 new hires will be added to my program to replace them, which means that I will be the "senior" in this program and most experienced! Which means I will be spending a lot of time training new coworkers, and in addition to that I will be supervising a Volunteer. It is going to be a lot more responsibility on my part, and it will make my resume look pretty sharp! To be honest though, I am a little nervous about the changes, and don't find myself to be quite confident enough. But a change will be good. People have been listening to me complain too much about wanting a change, so I guess I'm getting what I asked for... sort of.

I have been struggling a bit financially, so I am getting a bit serious about finding a rooommate and getting a different place in order to save some money. Trying to decided if it would actually save me money. I guess it all depends.

The sun poked out after a long rain... that always makes me happy.

The Prayer of John Milton as he took up his pen to write Paradise Lost

Above all temples
you chiefly prefer
Oh Spirit
The heart upright
and pure.

Instruct me
You who know
For You were present
from the first.

You sat
dove like
With might
and outspread wings
Brooding over the vast abyss
And made
it pregnant.

Oh Spirit
what in me
Is dark
Illumine.

Searching. . .
.
.
.
.

searching for some words to express. . .

.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.

whatever is going on inside. . .

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

Looking for even ONE word. . .

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

My vocabulary isn't big enough

I told him I would paint him something.
But the canvas is still blank.

Am I too late?

Or is it never too late to keep a promise?

I think I will try.

Yes, That's Me

Who is this person looking back at me in the miror. She seems nice enough. If you really knew her I think you would realize what a treasure she is. Not because of anything great she says or does, but because she believes whole-heartedly that God loves and accepts you no matter what and so does she. And that kind of love can only come from the fact that she believes that God loves her and accepts her no matter what. If you really knew her you would know that despite all her flaws and silly issues, she really only cares about pleasing the Lord and being "peachy" with all mankind. Can't we all just get along? If you really knew her you would realize that just because she doesn't talk to you doesn't mean she doesn't care. She just isn't great at small talk. She's always thinking about something. If you really knew her you would know how utterly silly she is, how she loves to go on little adventures, loves to play in the rain, loves to revel in her own dorkiness, loves to lay out on the floor and worship Jesus to some powerhouse worship songs, loves her family, loves getting into lives of people of other cultures, loves the sky. If you really knew her, you would know she is never content with mundane, never content with typical, never content with average, never content with comfortable... which is funny that her name means "contented one." If you knew her you would realize how fragile, scarred, and vulnerable she is even when she tries so hard to be strong. The walls she builds to protect herself are not that difficult to get over...there's an unlocked door for anyone who cares to find it. If you knew her you would realize that time spent means more than any words, any touch, any gift, any apology. She may seem distant and aloof; she may not wear her heart on her sleave; she may be hard to read sometimes; but she's got something special and unique. And the only reason I can say this about her is cause Jesus told me so. He told me she is his favorite! And if he think she's worth knowing, than I'm gonna trust Him. He knows what He's talking about. And anyone who doesn't agree, well, they have no idea what they are missing and I pitty them.

I get such a kick out of this.

There are other underlined things occasionally throughout my blogging, and incase you didn't know: they are links.

Heroes

Heroes, all of them,at least they're my heroes, especially the new immigrants, especially the refugees. Everyone makes fun of the New York cab drivers who can't speak English: they're heroes. To give up your country is the hardest thing a person can do: to leave the old familiar places and ship out over the edge of the world to America and learn everything over again different than you learned as a child, learn the new language that you will never be so smart or funny in as in your true language. It takes years to start to feel semi-normal. And yet people still come from Russia, Vietnam and Cambodia and Laos, Ethiopia, Iran, Haiti, Korea, Cuba, Chile, and they come on behalf of their children, and they come for freedom. Not for our land (Russia is as beautiful), not for our culture (they have their own, thank you), not for our system of government (they don't even know about it, maybe not even agree with it), but for freedom. They are heroes who make an adventure on our behalf, showing by their struggle how precious beyond words freedom is, and if we knew their stories, we could not keep back the tears. --Garrison Keillor

He Walks With Me

I come to the garden alone

While the dew is still on the roses

And the voice I hear,

falling on my ear

The Son of God discloses.

And he walks with me

And he talks with me

And he tells me I am His own

And the joy we share as we tarry there

None other has ever known.

He speaks and the sound of His voice

Is so sweet the birds hush their singing

And the melody that He gave to me

Within my heart is ringing.

And he walks with me

And he talks with me

And He tells me I am His own

And the joy we share as we tarry there

None other has ever known.

I'd stay in the garden with Him

Tho the night around me be falling

But He bids me go;

through the voice of woe

His voice to me is calling.

And He walks with me

And He talks with me

And He tells me I am His own

And the joy we share as we tarry there

None other has ever known

Muslim Eyes

Ayaan Hirsi

I had the most interesting conversation with a client. Amun is the sweetest little Somali girl you'd ever meet. She's soft spoken, pretty, petite, and friendly. But some things that came out of her mouth shocked me.
It is Ramadan now. Ramadan is the Muslim month of fasting and praying. They fast from sun-up to sun-down, then gorge themselves at night and early morning. We had the most interesting conversation about her religion. She mentioned that she knows of a Christian girl who converted to Islam. I in turn said that I know some Muslims who've converted to Christianity. That is when she began to talk about Ayaan Hirsi. Amun hates Ayaan Hirsi. She said that Ayaan Hirsi is a very bad person and "we want to kill her." She told me how Ayaan Hirsi is a Somali woman who converted to Christianity and now speaks out against Islam, Muhammad, and the Qur'an. This sweet girl contorted as she spoke of this woman, her hate became a fire in her eyes and her kindness erased. She spoke of wanting to murder this woman and felt completely justified. She said anyone who kills Ayaan Hirsi will go straight to heaven. I was shocked by the blatant wickedness and was unsure how to respond. I said that killing is never ok, that it is God's job to chose who will live and who will die. She agreed with me but then said how Ayaan Hirsi is so bad for speaking against Muhammad and the Qur'an she must be killed. Wow. It was intense.

I did some research on Ayaan Hirsi. This woman definitely speaks very openly against Islam, but she is not a Christian. She is a professed atheist. It is interesting me that Amun called her a Christian. I suppose to her, anyone who is not a Muslim must be Christian, or at least any one who is influenced by Western thought.
What an insight into the Muslim mindset. They don't even know what a real Christan is. I would like for Amun to know. I would like to tell her. But I am afraid. Please pray for me. This job I have is so strategic. God has placed me in the paths of so many who need to know him. What an obvious opportunity I have to share the Truth. Please pray that I won't let it pass me by. The seriousness of this position I am in is a bit overwhelming.

Despite her broken English we talked for two hours. This is just one of the topics we discussed, but I found it disturbing and facinating. I think my interest in her caused her to build trust and respect in me. She's normally very timid because of her insecurity with her English. There's no doubt in my mind that there's some serious warfare to be had for these lives. She has a name. She has a face. She has a life. Her heart is black with hate. Still she is loved by God. And He wants her.

Mysteriously Hugged

I'm convinced that God is in the wind. Or at least he can be.
Maybe it was the fact that I didn't wear enough layers and I got goose bumps from the chill...
Maybe it was the fact that I had minutes earlier accidentally run over a squirrel and was feeling incredibly bad about it.
Or maybe, just maybe ... God was in the wind.

I took a walk in the park and sat myself down on a bench near the man-made pond. And that's when the wind blew, and I felt Him. It was a gentle, loving reminder that He's here and He loves me. Perhaps He is always in the wind, but we are too busy to notice. But when you are still, and quiet, and near water for some reason, and you are alone... there He is. It's a beautiful thing.

Surviving Obnoxious

God is teaching me about hope lately. This mainly because I had gotten my hopes up about something only to have them crushed. It hurt a lot. I literally had the thought that I hated to hope because it can lead to such disappointment. But then I remember that verse that says just the opposite: hope does not disappoint.... but it is when we put our hope in the Lord! And I can trust that when I put my hope in him I will not be disappointed. This is so comforting.

I have still been feeling restless even after taking the vacation intended to renew me. Still I feel restless. I was intensely motivated today to get out of debt so that I can go. I want to go to Africa. I met a girl Sunday who spent some time in Mozambique with Rolland and Heidi Bakers team. I can't wait to hear more about her experiences. It is going to take me more than two years to get out of debt if I am a good girl and don't spend too much on frivolous things.

I was reminded again today though, that perhaps the reason I constantly feel restless is because there is more for me than this. I don't think I was meant to live the normal American life. I know that if I settled for that (which would be EXTREMELY easy to do, which is scary because the possibility is so real and ... possible) I would not be living life to the fullest or in God's perfect will. I still don't know what I'm supposed to be doing and where I am supposed to be. I take my eyes off of him so easily.

I am not like other people. I cannot be satisfied with normal. I cannot be content with average or mundane. My soul longs for more than the everyday. My passions go so far beyond trendy clothes, nice cars, and big bank accounts. I would be totally selling out if I gave in to that life style where those things mattered more than people. I don't think those things are bad or wrong, but I just know in my depths that there is something different for me. How terribly easy it would be to get comfortable there... and I admit I have more than I'm proud of. I've spent more money on shopping this past year then I want to admit. I have a wonderful awesome car. And I spend money like I have some. These things are all great. But my heart longs for more. I'm impatient to know what that More is.

Above all, I feel a discontentment just being in this world. I want so badly just to be with Jesus and be free from all the silly cares and worries that drag me down and make me forget Him. Things like boys, money, work, friends, sin and condemnation, entertainment, family even. I just want to leave it all behind and bury myself in His arms for the rest of eternity. It makes me lazy to want to live here. But I am here, and I'm not yet in His arms. So what can I do to pass the time? I might as well do something worth while, and I'm sure he has plans for what that would be. I just pray that I will be sensitive enough to his voice to not only listen, but obey. Obeying is the hard part.

My God is so good and kind to me. More gentle than any lover could be. Oh how I long for his presence. Lord give me the grace to put up with another day on this obnoxious earth.

You are worthy!
Be praised, You Who Lived Your Life Sinless!