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I'm having one of those moments of contemplation, but not sure if I should waste the time if I'm not going to come to any conclusions or defining moments.
I rather feel like Paul in Romans 7 today. On second thought, not quite. It's not that I do what I don't want to do and don't do what I want to do, but rather I do what I want to do but probably shouldn't and want to want to do what I should do. But then is there really "shoulds?" If everything is permissable but not everything beneficial, does that take away "shoulds?" Or is the "should" that which is permissable AND beneficial and the shouldn't the permissable but not beneficial?
I feel like I'm to old to be dealing with drama. Drama is for high-schoolers and college kids, right? Is it just a myth that life is supposed to get simpler when you get older? Well, maybe drama never dies, but at least I feel like I should know who I am and what I believe and be able to stick by that. There's that "should" again.
Perhaps I secretly like the drama since it keeps life interesting.

And then there's God. When I take my eyes off myself and back on him, that's when things really clear up and that's where simple comes in. Even though things may still seem hairy, at least I can trust him that he knows how to untagle my mess. He just wants me to love him, and its not about "shoulds" and "shouldn'ts" anymore. It's so simple.